Our Story
Part One
One of the greatest gifts I’ve been given in my life so far is the honouring, humbling, intimidating, and challenging gift of being a Mom. Yes, the capitalization of Mom was on purpose. I consider Mom to be both a name and a title, and I wear it proudly.
I’d like to share here a story that is so very precious to my heart, the story of becoming a Mom to my daughters. I can hardly write that without my eyes welling up with tears. When the adoption finalized, we received a card from our social worker stating: “Adoption is when a child grew in its mommy’s heart instead of her tummy” and that could not be more true here.
The card our adoption social worker gave us after the process was FINALLY complete.
Welcome to the story of my family, I hope you hold it in your hands gently, or embrace it with your own heart, because this story is such a vital part of mine and Dylan’s heart.
The day I became a mom probably looks a little different than the days other ladies became moms. It wasn’t a day really, but more a series of days and events; a process really. As you may or may not know Dylan’s parents are Foster Parents, a title that deserves capitalization as well. Nine years ago this month, two beautiful though sadly neglected little girls were placed in my in-law’s home, for what was supposed to be a short-term emergency placement. One girl was a 5 month old blonde-haired, blue-eyed beauty, the other was her equally beautiful 2 year 4 month old red-haired, blue-eyed sister.
Who could have known this would be one of the first of hundreds of photos as these little beauties were woven forever into our hearts.
These girls should not have been placed in Hugh & Sally’s home, they usually only took on teens, but here they were anyway. I can still remember hearing from my (then future) mother-in-law that the girls had been placed with them. We were all a little surprised by the placement and adding these young girls to the mix was a bit of a culture shock as well, but again it was only going to be temporary. A few days at most. The youngest girl, Justice, stayed with my in-laws (and her sister) for less than a month before being placed back in the care of her father. The older, Tapanga, stayed much longer.
One of the first times I met Tapanga, the first time she was in my home, I was totally taken aback. As an only child I had very little experience with young children because my closest little cousins were only a few years younger than me, and they were the only kids I ever baby-sat. By this time I did have a young nephew, Joel, but he lived in Barrhead and we lived in Edmonton. To say my experience with young kids was limited would be a significant understatement.
Hugh and Sally stopped by our house once on the way to Calgary, and teased that I should watch her for the weekend. As I observed her carrying my cat, Spook, Elmyra style I thought (and probably exclaimed) “Are you kidding me?” From my worldview Tapanga seemed to be a bundle of energy that never sat still and never stopped talking.
Source: http://pixgood.com/tiny-toons-elmyra.html
Adding to my lack of experience with kids, and my quick, likely unfair appraisal of her behaviour, was my own agenda. I had plans for the weekend; a big paper was coming due so I intended to spend all my time working on that. A high-energy two-year old most certainly did not fit into those plans! They may have been joking about that weekend visit, but little did any of us know there would be nearly uncountable visits in the coming year. Had someone told me what was in store for us, I probably would have laughed cynically. Or, maybe I wouldn’t have. From the start, despite her age and personality being outside my usual comfort zone, something about her spoke to my heart in a strange and unfamiliar way. Some part of me always wanted to defend or justify her behaviour, and at times I did.
Whatever feelings may have been stirring deep below the surface, hidden from my conscious awareness, Tapanga didn’t fit into my future plans any better than she had fit into that weekend’s plans. Why would she? After all, surely she would be moving on to a new placement, or back home, soon. Adding to that, Dylan and I were not married, and I was only about six months away from completing my degree.
Then one day, with just one fateful phone call, everything changed.
To be continued…
Kyla
Sally says
Even though I know the next line (probably) I’m anxious to hear the story lol! This by far is one of my most blessed events next to the birth of every grandchild! Dont worry and Carry on…… ?
Kyla says
? thanks for the love! It will be continued
Marge says
That’s so beautiful Kyla! So heartfelt. I can’t wait for the next instalment. This is great. Seeing that picture of those two beautiful girls brought tears to my eyes.
Kyla says
Thanks Margie ? I had a tear or 2 when I started this yesterday
Jennifer Danielson says
Please continue…….
Kyla says
Part 2 is up 🙂
Jennifer says
I started tearing up and the story is just beginning. You are both so wonderful and I can’t thank you enough for brining these girls into my life. They are a huge part of not just me but Sadie too. By far some of my most favorite people in this world. ❤️
Kyla says
Thanks cuz, writing it touched me as well. It means so much to have people in their lives who love and value them as deeply as we do.
Rosemary Demers says
Beautiful Family!
Kyla says
Thank you Rose!
Jenny says
I am a total stranger to you, but I am very interested in your story and am just starting to read it one day at a time and sharing your story too. It touched me on a few levels the first installment. Thanks for sharing because I know it takes courage to do so. Looking forward to hearing the rest of the story.
Kyla says
Thank you so much for your support and encouragement! I have completed up to “part 10” now, and I might take a break from “our story” as that pretty well brings us up to date (or pretty close). I do however intend to continue writing 😀