During the Christmas season the story of the arrival of Jesus, and all the remarkable events in and around his arrival, is at the forefront of the hearts and minds of many. One morning during the most recent Christmas season, while reading in Luke, a new viewpoint downloaded into my heart and mind. While many of us have considered the enormity of the honour of being the mother of Jesus, how often have we contemplated the weight of it all? I am not only referring to the crushing pain of watching your first born die like a guilty criminal, despite being the most innocent man of all; I am talking about something else entirely.
Have you ever contemplated in your heart the burden of parenting a child with an incredible call on their life, a child who has something unusual–both in its beauty and in its pain–to journey though? Never before or since has the arrival of a child been packed with such potential; the weight of parental responsibility is too great to fathom! Why would God choose Mary and Joseph to raise His son? Did He not know that Mary was still a teen, that the couple was betrothed and not yet wed? Did He not know that Mary’s family was not wealthy, nor was Joseph? Did God not realize that Mary and Joseph had no parenting experience, and that they would likely make many mistakes while raising His son, Jesus? Was God not concerned that Mary and Joseph’s imperfect parenting might effect Jesus, that these effects might derail him from the calling on his life?
The one who created the universe most assuredly knew the struggles and weaknesses of the pair he was entrusting to raise the Newborn King. Though God knew all the reasons why Mary and Joseph shouldn’t parent Jesus, more importantly he knew all the reasons why they should. The Lord knew that Mary had pure heart and an unshakable faith. When she learned she was going to be the mother of the Savior, Mary asked with an open heart how this would happen, and then sang a prophetic song of praise and joy; a song which actually included Old Testament phrases. Clearly the future mother of the Lord placed a high value on her relationship with her heavenly Father and devoted herself to knowing Him through both His scriptures and through prayer.
The Lord knew Joseph as well, and while we do not read a lot about him, there are enough clues in the Bible that I can imagine some of the key character traits he must have possessed. Joseph was a man of faith, who heard from God and ordered his steps accordingly. We know this because when Joseph considered quietly leaving Mary after she told him she was pregnant, he had an angelic visitation in a dream, which led to him keeping his word to Mary. While this example is quite notable and of significance all on it own, it is not the only time Joseph hears from God and obeys. The will of God impacted Joseph’s plans numerous times; from the escape to Egypt, to the family’s eventual return (where they settled in Nazareth), Joseph obeyed God, and as a result Jesus’s story from his earliest days lined up perfectly with the prophetic promises found in the scriptures. Joseph was little more than a background player in the story of Jesus, and that in itself tells us something invaluable about Joseph’s nature. Joseph was willing to follow the path God laid out for him even though his journey was to guaranteed to bring many challenges, and little in the way of human celebrity. The heart of Joseph must have been truly humble and in pursuit of the Father’s will for his life. Joseph would have provided for the physical needs of the family, and was also an earthly model of manhood and fatherhood for Jesus. While Jesus had a deep, intimate relationship with Father God, it was Joseph who was the physical representation of a father. It could not have been easy raising a son, showing him the right way to live, while the son also had a deep father son relationship with God as his Father. That situation feels like it could have been frustrating and conflicting, what a tremendous responsibility Joseph carried! To be this father to Jesus, Joseph had to have a deep faith and connection to the heart of God.
Another complicating matter in the parenting of Jesus was the social implications the family would have faced. In the era Jesus was born into, walking the path of a poor carpenter and his unwed, pregnant betrothed would not have been easy. This little family would likely be on the fringe of their community, a hard-working but maybe an “other side of the tracks” brood who was far from embraced by the greater community. While we know that Mary was born into an honourable family, being pregnant outside of marriage would have brought shame to her and Joseph. In Jewish culture, outside appearances and following Mosaic customs were of utmost importance, so much so that it is difficult for us in our modern culture to comprehend the burden this shame would have brought to the young family.
To bring this back to my original point, Jesus who was fully God and fully human, was being raised by Mary and Joseph who–though fully human and not at all divine, were fully enough. God’s plans and purposes are above our parental mistakes, and our circumstantial shortcomings! While I would never condone taking a laissez-faire approach to parenting–I absolutely believe in learning and growing at all times and through all things–I do want to point out something that I think is so valuable. God’s plans and purposes for your child cannot be derailed by your human frailty, you’re not that powerful! You matter, what you say, what you do, how you handle your mistakes, those things all matter. However, the God of the universe loves your child far more than you do, far more than you can even begin to comprehend! He has a plan and a purpose for your life and the life of your child; and in all things there is redemption. Not one tear is wasted, not one mistake cannot be used for good! Unfortunately, our stories do not always bear the fruit we would hope for, our child may not get the story line we would have written. You are not alone in your grief! God would have been so incredibly crushed to see His only son die like a criminal for the mistakes of the world, but Jesus’s one perfect sacrifice has paid the price for us to live in a restored relationship with God the Father. This perfect example of sacrificial love shows us that even when we do not see the outcome we may have wanted for our child, God can and often will, use our pain as a payday for something fare greater than ourselves.
God’s plan for Jesus was not limited by Mary and Joseph’s humanity, and neither is His plan for your child limited by you. All things can be worked for a greater good, and your story is not over yet.
Kyla
Marge Bellerose says
Absolutely beautiful! So we’ll written, so much truth, so much grace and reassurance of God’s powerful love and purposes for each one of us.