In Four “Easy” Steps!
As I sit here, with these thoughts percolating, and a desire to share my heart on this subject, I hesitate to even begin. I, like most I am sure, am SO TIRED of all the talk about the little ol’ virus that showed up at the end of 2019. I don’t even want to write the name. I realize that by writing this I am giving “it” more air time. More conversation. More thought. Yuck. However, I know that it is nearly impossible for us to completely ignore something that has so impacted nearly every area of our lives.
While we cannot ignore the virus, nor its impact on our day to day, we can endeavor to knock its pseudo-crown off its outer shell, and displace it from the throne of our hearts and minds. But, how do we do this? I know I do not have all the answers, and I may get some of this wrong, but I intend to process through some thoughts and ideas in an attempt to help myself (and hopefully you) with vital task.
1. Put first things first:
What is it in your life that you find most important? What did the viral event distance or distract you from the most? If you are a person of faith, perhaps you talked about the virus more than you talked about your god. If you are close to your family, maybe you found it difficult to stay connected with all the restrictions or, worse yet, perhaps strong opinions around the big issues caused division within your family. For some it could be that your friends are as dear to you as family, and that the challenges of connecting or agreeing on these tough issues caused separation in these relationships.
Whatever vitally important thing has been wounded by, or taken a back seat to, this long-standing annoyance, perhaps now is the time to correct whatever can be corrected. Spend more time in your holy book and in prayer. Make amends with family and friends if necessary, or simply take deliberate action to reconnect in whatever way you can. Another piece of advice on this: limit or completely eliminate talk of the virus, especially if it is known that polarized, opposing views exist. Pause and read that last sentence again (I’m talking to myself more than you when I say that).
2. Deliberately reengage life and joy:
There is a meme I have seen shared a number of times on social media, and while it is cliche it is also true Do What Makes Your Soul Shine. That though has been coming to me more and more lately, and I have been recognizing what things light me up, and what things dim my light. While I was resting and isolating to prevent sharing my little bout of the virus, I found myself with a paintbrush in hand many days, and I have also been finding myself at the keyboard typing away more frequently! When I pause to think, “what is it that I do, or what is it about me, that excites me,” I immediately think “writing!”, followed quickly by “painting!” I love to bake, I love to play sports, and I am a creative person. While I cannot sit at a canvas or computer engaging creativity all day everyday, I can be deliberate with my time and ensure I carve some time out for one or more of my passions at least every other day.
In order to find time for my life-giving activities, I do need to be deliberate about setting time aside. I have found the best way for me to do that is to leave my phone out of easy reach. It is so easy for me to get sucked into opening social media, or have a thought I “need to” look up, and when that happens my time can be vacuumed up faster than the dust-bunnies I am currently ignoring! Currently, that master of distraction is right beside me, and while I am currently ignoring it, it did distract me earlier today. I am a work in progress, but awareness of the problem is the first step in finding freedom, right?
3. Stop giving “it” free airtime in your mind
While I have made this my third point, it may be the most important one. It may also be the most difficult to put into practice. I believe there is a place for research, for critical thought, and for most certainly for prayer. I believe any difficult situation or topic will often consume a large amount of our mental and emotional energy, and that shifting into a healthy balance can be quite difficult. For me personally, I find I will waste less time overthinking a challenging topic if I simply pray about it. When I pray first (or when I begin with overthinking but then submit to the realization that prayer is my path forward) peace and clarity quickly follow, and the need to overthink dissipates.
I think it is no surprise so many of us have been sucked into over-thinking, over-researching, over-worrying, and over-talking this subject. Our lives have been tossed topsy-turvy, and it feels like a nearly impossible task to keep track of what the expectations, suggestions, and mandates are at a given time. While I do have significant empathy for those making the regulations, I also face feelings of frustration and uncertainty. However, rarely have I felt MORE peace by continuing to work the issue over in my mind, by googling, or by opening a social media article. Recently some of my own views were challenged by events in my own life, and out came the all-knowing google. My search engine was quickly flooded numerous articles containing massive amounts of information. Most articles held essentially the same view, and a few were contrary to the rest. In the end, I did what I wish I had started with; I prayed, submitting my fears and feelings to God. Anxiety left, peace returned, and I realized that whether I was right or wrong, I had done the best I could in making my decision.
It is healthy to re-evaluate our stances as increasing information becomes available. However, it is unhealthy to meditate and fixate on data and information, dedicating countless hours in pursuit of the truth (or information that supports what we have decided is truth).
4. Disband division in your heart, mind, and conversations
Can I challenge you (and me) to be open to changing our stance but, more importantly, can I challenge us to NOT attempt to change the mind of others? Can we strive to not dismiss a person’s stance simply because it disagrees with ours? It may be that you (or I) have already carefully evaluated their viewpoint and, for us, it is untrue. However, even if you are certain that the other person’s view is “wrong”, is your opinion of greater value than the person whose opinion is different than yours? I have heard it said, and I cannot agree more, “what’s more important, the relationship or being right?” So maybe you don’t have a relationship with the keyboard warrior you’re attempting to inform, cool. Does that make them any less human? Any action intended to correct, inform, or persuade, taken outside of relationship, feeds the beast of division. Division is likely the most deadly threat that has been ushered in since this all began. Do not feed the beast.
Conversations on controversial topics can be engaged if absolutely necessary but, if we’re really honest, how often are these conversations necessary or beneficial? One of the surest ways to knock this bug that’s bugging us off its stolen throne is to simply disengage it. The reality of illness and death from it is still present. Differing thoughts on how to best navigate these challenges are not likely to leave. What can leave is our stubborn fixation on the data, our opinions, and our judgments of those around us. I’ll say it again, with conviction, in an attempt to help it really sink into my heart; what can leave is MY stubborn fixation on the data, my opinions, and my judgements of those around me.
If we can put these things into action in our own hearts, if we can remember that we still are all in this together, maybe we will finally be able to knock that crown straight off its outer shell.
If you’re a person of faith, remember where you are called to cast your crowns and who is truly on the throne.
Kyla
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